Book Club, February 1, 2010

on Tuesday 02 February 2010
by laureld author list
in Chat archives

I would like to pick up this conversation in two weeks. The book "Minding our Elders" is pretty short. And the chapters are good 5 minutes reads. I am going to focus on the second half of the book. If however, you can join me, please just focus a few chapters that were meaningful to you. Amazon has this book available; I haven't seen it on the Carnegie Library website. It is a 2005 edition so it should be easy to request. Take care!
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:58] 		I would love to hear your thoughts. I will be here for a while if you would like to talk.
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:56] 		Notice in Ann’s story how the experiences of childhood, the emotions related to jealousy, to favoritism~ perceived or real~ play themselves out. Ann’s experience gives her the opportunity to be recognized and appreciated by her mother.
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:56] 		The Kelly’s articulate the long struggle that occurs with an inability to be understood. A beloved uncle loses his ability to express himself. Words fail but emotions and frustrations grew. This is painful to watch, to understand and to help.
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:54] 		If the person that you are caring for doesn’t recognize your sacrifice, does it feel like your choice is less worthy? Is it a choice? Do you need to be recognized?
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:54] 		All of these struggles become a contemplation of how we identify ourselves as caregivers.
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:51] 		As much as the caregivers stories moved me, I was moved as well by the care recipient stories. Some were confused at the end, some were angry. None had expected their lives to be like this. Joe noted that his address book was filled with people who had died. Susan’s mother was upset to be moved from her home and mistrustful of the circumstances around her. she had even suspected her daughter who so stressed with caregiving to be trying to get at her mother's money. Money was the motivation. Confusion, lack of control/loss of control. Emotional vulnerability. These things can all contribute to miscommunications. That and illness and medication.
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:49] 		That is not an unusual story. Caregivers can allow their own well being to be compromised through their commitment to someone else.
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:48] 		I like the variety in the caregivers represented. We have long distance, the good neighbor (Fly Away Joe), daughters and sons who sacrifice and those who try and balance. I was particularly struck by Julie’s story. Julie realized her limits and tried to reduce her commitment. She suffered a stroke.
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:44] 		sorry....the chat is a little slow tonight so some of my posts are appearing twice (as I rewriting them if they don't appear)
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:41] 		As I went through the stories, I thought about a few questions that set the framework for me: Who do you identify with as a caregiver? Look at the impact that the experience had on each narrator. How has cargiving impacted your life?
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:39] 		This compilation of stories shows the types of caregivers that we represent. Although these stories are related to aging they are still stories that we can all benefit from.
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:39] 		Back to the book. Tonight we were talk about the first 18 stories....and if you read them we can still do that. But the stories are pretty rich so I would like to talk a little about them and my thoughts. Your thoughts are welcome too!
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:38] 		You are welcome to just read along. If you would like to post, you will need to log in. If you have not created an account, you will need to do in the login area. Sorry that we require this, but it reduces the spam to the site.
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:37] 		If you are new to PCSN this is our book club. We also offer two-three caregiver chats a month.
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:36] 		I picked this book because it is a collection of stories of caregivers.
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:36] 		tonight we are talking about Carolyn Bradley Bursack's book, "Minding our elders, caregivers share their personal stories"
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 19:34] 		welcome!
fitzgerald

[01 Feb : 16:59] 		Book club is tonight at 7:30~ If you haven't read the book, it is ok. We are discussing a series of vignettes about caregivers. Each chapter is pretty short, so if you are able to read even one you can contribute. And of course, you are always welcome to add comments later.